Tuesday, October 6, 2015

With A Single Puff Of Breath

With A Single Puff Of Breath
Everything about and around the shamiyana appeared to be at ease, reciprocating the cool and pleasant weather of October; everything, except me. There was a slight trembling of the lips, and a sigh escaped the lips so softly that no one but me could hear it.

She was a fairy in a fairy-tale that was yet to begin. Her animated face spoke louder than the silence that surrounded it; it fostered in both of us an artificial indifference to the sequence of events that had occurred recently in our lives. But the indifference was to be temporary, I know. It offered a neutral period to muster strength to bear the wear and tear that time was to effect as it flows on.

I could see a nervous blush on her face as she moved out of the cool shade of celibacy into the scorching heat of marital life. She looked great in the traditional bridal attire, and yet she was not the goddess I was to worship. The warmth of her presence in the shamiyana was more comfortable than the warmth of the sun on a tingling winter day. There was a distracting wish in me to be near her, but her blood red bangles reminded me that someone else held the right now. A storm raged on  within me even as I witnessed the end of yet another infatuation.

Life was opening a new chapter for her. The nikah was to be conducted in a few hours, and the contract was going to complete the caesarean section initiated by my unemployment. She was to move on to the next level of her life, while I was to be left standing where I was. I salute her for the exemplary principles she had. She had managed to blow out all candles symbolizing youthful attractions on the cake of her youth with a single puff of breath. Somehow she knew the candles were never to be lighted again. All the same, she was to shed a lot of tears in a couple of hours. I wonder if she was going to think of me. It wasn’t going to be easy for her too, I know. It was going to be quite dark for a change, and for a change, it was going to be quite good. The darkness was going to make his form all the more attractive for her. Here was someone who had conquered the sway of time in his favour. I wasn’t sure if I should fan the jealousy I felt or not.

She could see  me quite clearly while the candles burnt. We were neighbours, and we were in love. Social and economic differences highlighted by her parents reigned supreme over all other considerations. I didn’t fit the bill prepared by her parents in any manner considering my unemployed status. My attempts to convince her parents of the merits of my educational-qualifications didn’t bear fruit. We did consider the option of running away from home, but financial constraints imposed by my unemployed status negated the option. The contention assumed such huge proportions that falling in love while being unemployed appears to be a sin.

The truth is that I’ve been unemployed for quite some time. Fate and destiny have a lot to say in these matters, and my destiny said I am to remain unemployed. I consider my peers who find employment at the outset of their careers quite lucky. I’ve only been unlucky in this quarter. My fate has something else in store for me, something much better.

The storm within me began to ebb as I too blew out the lantern that epitomized our love with a single puff of breath, and moved out of the shamiyana into the open.



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