Monday, April 25, 2016

A Plea To Allah

It was a hot and dry day in April. A secluded corner in Café Coffee Day gave us a delightful chance of a tête-à-tête, nobody else being in the café. We were talking of old times when I suddenly put my hand upon her hand; she was a bit surprised, but she only smiled in retaliation. I was surprised, I expected to rise and leave the outlet in response, but she merely smiled at me. Apparently, things had changed at her end.

I could see that though she was the same shy and innocent girl I once knew, a few years of girlhood in Aligarh had extracted most of the simplicity out of her. We were in the University Canteen when I first met her on the pretext of exchanging class-notes. Our hearts always missed a beat when we were together after this. To encourage our hearts to take a recess, we made it a point to be there after regular classes everyday. We didn’t much to discuss, the lectures being quite enough themselves, but we liked being with each other.

We had come a long way since then, a lot had changed, but a connection still seemed to throb between us.

A wide gulf separated the youth in Aligarh and the lady I was before today. She was no longer the slim young lady I once knew. She had become a confident buxom bodied woman brave enough to fight the world on her own terms. She did look a bit different when we talked of the good old times. She looked quite good in all the trinkets and ornaments she had on. I had never seen her in such ostentation before:  student-life was so simple: there was only a lipstick and kaajal those days, and that too to keep up with her peers. The lady before me had elaborate gold earrings, and a gold chain to compliment the sari.

A lot of maturity had settled into her. I was sitting before an adult woman in a designer sari. She was quite different from the lass I knew while in Aligarh. I wanted to compliment her for her good looks when a man walked into he outlet. I was a bit surprised when he indicated an intimacy with her and    snuggled close to her on the sofa. She introduced him as her husband.

She had moved on from the time we were students in Aligarh. She even told me of a son who was in school. My heart wept a few silent tears when I thought of all that I had missed without Zeenat. Zeenat would have been a part of the world a long time ago had it not been for the set of physical handicaps I have. Life would have been different.

I wonder if I  should thank Allah for keeping me away from the fun and excitement Zeenat would have brought into the world because this would have meant a different set of problems for me. I was not a party to these problems, but was I better off without them? I wonder if this has been Allah’s motive behind keeping Zeenat in the trove of my dreams for such a long time. What do you say?

She told me she had been in touch with everyone from out batch: everyone had moved on and was well-settled. Most of my peers are at the apex of their careers thinking of how to tackle the host of issues that rattle their everyday lives. I do wonder if I am better off without having to bother about any of the issues.

On second thoughts, I wouldn’t mind having to deal with any issue if only Allah would give me the strength and courage to bear them with a smile. May Allah help me.  

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