Zeenat: A Stronger Force Than Gravitation In My Life

Zeenat: A Stronger Force Than Gravitation In My Life
Unconditional love is always stronger than the experience when two people love each other, it is said. This means my love for Zeenat is to be stronger than what is to be experienced at any other front. There are to be a whole lot of relations I am to discover while I move along the paths of life holding Zeenat’s hands, but I and Zeenat shall hold each other’s hands quite tightly throughout the sojourn. The bond is to be stronger than any other bond I shall ever form in the future or any I have ever formed in the past.

Practically, Zeenat is to signal the dawn of a new era in my life where there is to be bright sunshine for a long time. A long day is to be followed by a short and brief night, but it will be further abbreviated by the feeling of wellness propelled within me by virtue of the contrast provided by the long day I shall go though. I do wonder what other miracles Zeenat shall effect in my life when she joins me. Zeenat is like a fairy to me who has powers to dispel quite a bit of the angst and stress collected in me over decades of my existence.

I do wonder if I’m heading in the right direction when I am harbouring a lot of expectations from an entity yet to be born. She is someone who stands in full regalia of my future beckoning me towards her. She has been doing this for  a long time, but I haven’t been able to do anything concrete about following the signs she has been making. She has been calling me from a far off distance with all kinds of fluctuations and variations in her voice, I haven’t been able to do anything about any of the shrill cries, and I strongly feel I have been wrong in ignoring her signals. I wish I could have done something concrete about it at an earlier point of time; life would have been quite different.

At times I feel the abstract form of Zeenat to be better than any concrete reality. The abstract form doesn’t have any fallacies or foibles. It shall be replaced by a concrete form which is sure to have a lot of these. The concrete form is also  sure to have a lot of wishes which I shall have to transform into a reality as soon as possible. I’m not sure if I shall be in a position to fulfill all her wishes; some of them shall be disproportionate to my potentials, but I’ll have to do my best. I’ll do my best to stick to the track I have been walking on in the hope of finding Zeenat on it one day, and I hope I can find the means of satisfying her needs on the same track.

The track I have been walking on is certainly a long one. I should have opted for a shorter path, but my fate put me on a long track which is quite arduous to walk over. I sometimes wonder why fate chose to honour me with a strikingly different route from what it chose for the crowd, and yet I have been pushed around with the crowd in a typical manner. I have had to adopt many norms of the crowd although I stand out by virtue of the longer route to happiness and satisfaction I chose. I shouldn’t have chosen a longer route to happiness; I wish I had gone with the crowd; I might have been a long way ahead of the destination by now.

I can never complain of the destination being shifted ahead for me as I neared it. It wasn’t the mirage I saw in a desert. I have been moving in a single direction, and the destination is certainly drawing nearer; it is only that I fail to perceive myself inching closer of the destination. This is because Zeenat remains the abstract entity she once was because a lot of equations are still to be solved. I can solve them by  moving in the direction I have been, although a still larg number of equations still remain unsolved.

I am in no hurry to solve the unsolved equations. This has been the nadir of the situation. I have not been in an apparent hurry to solve any of the equations that should be solved before Zeenat can be a part of the world. I haven’t felt the urgency behind preparing  any of the solutions. I have been under the impression that fate is to follow its own course, and like everything has happened in my life without my making any conscious effort for it, Zeenat shall also be here one day by herself when the appointed time comes. I haven’t done anything to pull the appointed time nearer, and I don’t  think I ever could have done anything concrete in this direction. This is why fate has chosen to delay her arrival into my life.

Well, I certainly cannot do anything concrete about it; I never was in a position to do anything concrete about Zeenat and her arrival into the world. I’m to follow the dictates of my fate throughout my life. It is to decide when Zeenat is to brighten up my life. Every inch of it is to be decorated with all the colours of the rainbow one day when she shall be a part of my world.

I hope the day is not far off.