Entering Paradise

Entering  Paradise
She helped me wade through a crisis in my life. It was a critical point in my life when I badly needed to share my thoughts with someone, and this was when I found her. these thoughts, unless shared with someone intimate,  had the    capacity of raising a pandemonium in my being . there were  a host of other feelings boiling to come out in one form or the other, and I didn’t know how to  bring them out. If I didn’t bring out my feelings in some form or the other, they were going to create a havoc in my being. The result was going to be catastrophic and it was going to be quite unpleasant for me and everyone around me.

I didn’t realise the gravity of the situation at that time. I wish I had realised her urgent need in my life. I wish there was a way I could bring back the time I missed the call to move on in life.  she was standing at the doorstep ringing all kinds of bells, seeking an entry, but I chose to ignore them. I wish I had given an ear to the bells she rang in my heart; life would have been quite different for both of us. I wish I had had wisdom of understanding the sonorous sounds of her heartbeats which thumped in her chest but resonated in my chest. Practically, there wasn’t a way of gauging the depth of the ocean of secrets where she held a whole lot of secrets buried deep within the chambers of  her heart.

I wanted to return the favour she had bestowed upon me by giving an ear to my heartbeats. This was a time when I needed a companion to help me tide over the dominant crises in my life. I badly wanted someone to give an ear to the sound of my heartbeats, and match her heartbeats with mine. The sound of our heartbeats was quite sharp and sonorous, but both of us were bent on making our hearts beat with the same rhythm.

They were quite different from the sound that resonated from her chest because we were different. She was aware of the difference, but she still wanted our hearts to ring the same tune. She was aware of the importance of this in her life. She had to do it to be happy. She had to do it in order to live a sustainable life.  She knew it.

She knew a companion was required to give her company through the tirades of life and for her well-being, and she knew she had to unite with the person she loved the most. She knew she had grown out of the age when her parents and friends occupied the dominant position in her life. There is someone else who is to be more important than anyone else in her life. She had to move on and embrace that person because he was going to give her happiness throughout her life. She knew she loved me, and she  knew she couldn’t love anyone else in the same manner.  She couldn’t find the same quantity of love from anyone else, she knew it.

Moving on in life and embracing another person as a companion is a part of ordinary life. There is nothing special in her case. This is something that happens with everyone. This is a truth she has to understand. It isn’t that she is not to find any amount of happiness in the older affiliations she had, but the typical kind of happiness she is to find with someone special in her life is not to be found with anyone else. She will have to bid goodbye to all her earlier affiliations   if she is to discover more happiness, or any amount of happiness, in my company. It is as if she was born to discover the typical happiness with me. I occupied the central place in her world now. All those who had occupied the particular position in her life had shifted to a secondary and tertiary position in her life now.

I marveled at the transformation effected in values in a single journey. The journey was to bring happiness for her, I know. It was going to bring health and happiness for her. A denial of the importance of the journey was going to be detrimental to her health and well-being, she knew this. She had to undertake the journey, and she had to undertake it as soon as possible. She didn’t have an option.

Whatever may anyone say of the importance of the relations we have in the world, she was out to discover the most important relationship in her life. It was going to be equivalent to being in paradise for her, and she wanted to be in paradise as soon as possible. I’m duty-bound to help her find it since she helped me out of an unpleasant  situation in my life.

I hope she discovers the paradise she wants to be in soon.