I Get A Reward

I Get A Reward
I found everything when I discovered her. The joy was comparable to that experienced by a famished Arab who pounces on a few dregs of water in a desert. I was virtually walking through a desert when I found some amount of relief from the scorching heat of the sun under a palm tree. It was an oasis where quite a few green trees abounded, and I only had to look closely into one of them to appreciate life symbolised by the green leaves. I wondered if appreciation of life is as important to make me walk through a desert with all its paraphernalia of sand and sun.

There was a dominance of sand in the atmosphere. It compounded the torture afflicted by the sun, the granules of sand burnt a couple of deep holes in my feet. I jumped up with pain and it was more of a dance that those passing-by may have witnessed. I wasn’t used to the intense heat the sand burned with. It seemed to be enough to boil a pot of water, but I walked on it, and I’m glad I did.

 The very fact that I kept on my efforts should be rewarded in some manner, and it was. I found myself in the company of green palm trees, and their shade proved to be worth all the trouble I had been through till now. I began to wonder why I wasn’t brought to the oasis at an earlier instance. Life would have been different had I been brought to the oasis at an earlier point of time in my history.

Life wanted me to make some more efforts than what I had made till an earlier point of time in my history. It wanted me to appreciate the oasis and all the relief it brought to me in a better format than I would have done had I been able to get there at an earlier point of time. The earlier point of time in my history that I deem to be perfect for my reaching the oasis may not have proved to be productive for me.

I may not have made a lot of efforts had I reached the oasis at an earlier point of time. All the efforts I have been making have been to get to the oasis in the desert, to get some amount of relief from the scorching heat of the sun. Had I got here at an earlier point of time, I may have not got the reward I have got now. It would have been a different reward, but I feel everyone gets the reward one deserves; the reward one gets is always proportional to the efforts one makes to get the reward.

I strongly feel life hasn’t been fair with me in this respect. I feel I have not been given the reward I should have got. Had my efforts to get the rewards been appreciated in the format they were initially in, I would certainly have got a different reward. I’m not sure if it would have been a bit better than the reward I am to hold in my hands once I get to it.

I don’t know if I am correct in criticizing the appreciation of my efforts. I don’t think I’m in a position to criticize anything on this end. I have no option but to accept an appreciation or a disparagement of my efforts. I don’t hold any rights to say anything of them. I can only make efforts and some more efforts. Deciding whether I get a reward or I get punished for them is certainly not my purview. Saying anything about the quality of reward I get is also not my domain.

On the other hand, being a passive individual who exists for the sole purpose of making efforts is also not going to be proper. Moreover, I am not likely to make efforts unless I am reinforced for them. The reinforcement I get, and the ease with which I get it determines a lot of my attitude towards the next effort I make. If the reward is delayed in any manner, I’m not likely to make any more efforts in future.

A delay in being rewarded is quite akin to being punished for my efforts. The reward has been delayed beyond reasonable limits in my case. I don’t even know what it is going to be like, and in what shape and form I shall be rewarded for all my efforts. The delay has made me feel I shall not be rewarded in any manner.

This belief runs contrary to a popular belief of all efforts being rewarded in a typical manner. I may not get the reward I deserve, it is going to prove to be a big blunder on the part of my fate if I don’t get rewarded in the appropriate manner now, but I don’t have an option to declare myself out of the race now. I’ll have to accept whatever reward I get, in whatever form it is, and whenever it is given to me: I don’t have a choice now.

The famished Arab cannot say he was never in the desert out hunting for water, nor can I ever say I wasn’t looking for an oasis while in the desert. The famished Arab shall be rewarded for whatever pain he had to undergo while in the desert, while I shall surely get to an oasis one day.